"It's about the journey, not the destination."

Where do I start, without sounding old, bitter and/or jaded. I am sick and tired of some of the new breed of rappers I have been dealing with.  I have come to some conclusions after much introspection and just in time for the 'PICK UP THE MIC' DVD release.

I first need to rewind and clue you in on how I became the DEADLEE you see today. It was 1994 when I began to rap with my best friend ROQUE at house parties. From 95-2000 I was basically rapping as a hobby. It was not until 2000 that I decided to get serious. I was at my lowest having just ended a 6yr relationship, my car was stolen, and I was starting a new job. I put any extra money I had into recording. I took the bus to my producers twice a month for over a year recording my first CD, SEVEN DEADLEE SINS.

In 2001 with a completed CD I began playing open mics, Sunset strip bars, Gay bars, and basically anywhere I could. At the end of 2001, I got my first mention in a publication, called BLUE from Australia. That article became a launching pad for me. Juba Kalamka from the original gay rap group RAINBOW FLAVA and of DDC fame, saw the article in BLUE and invited me to the 2nd PEACEOUT FESTIVAL in Oakland in 2002. PEACEOUT was an international gathering of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender hip-hop artists, activists, fans and supporters to celebrate the LGBT presence in hip-hop music and culture.

I took my posse of 8 including BBoy dancers, my DJ, and HYPE guys up the 5 FREEWAY from Los Angeles to OAKLAND! I was in hip hop heaven, as I was amongst other gay rappers. Before this festival,  I had only heard of one-- JUDGE "DUTCHBOY" MUSCAT had been mentioned in VIBE Magazine as an open gay rap artist. I was honored to meet the only gay rapper I had known of as well as many others. Some of the others included, TORI FIXX, GOD-DES and SHE, CAZWELL, DDC, and MISTER MAKER followed by JENRO and JOHNNY DANGEROUS and QBOY the next year.

2003/2004 was non stop shows, recording a 2nd CD - ASSAULT WITH A DEADLEE WEAPON, and a lot of hard self promotion hitting papers, magazines, TV shows, and PRIDES. I was the subject of not one, but 2 documentaries- HIP HOP HOMOS and PICK UP THE MIC.  All this was going on while I continued working as a counselor full time. During this same time, I took a trip to NYC just to record a song with DUTCHBOY and spend some time with one of the OG OUT RAPPERS. I knew that if I wanted to make it, I had to learn from the ones that started it. 

My CD completed, I became frustrated that as a gay rapper there was not a lot of interest or buzz. My CD was collecting dust and was packed away in boxes. It was in 2006, I found a manager in Camilo Arenivar who believed there was still life in my CD. MYSPACE was the upstart site that finally gave me access to thousands of fans around the world. I also found a USC film school student, JOHNNY SKANDROS, who was so touched by one of my songs -'GOOD SOLDIER 2'- that he wanted to film a video.  LOGO TV came out in 2007 just in time for my video to debut on the station and eventually be one of the best of the year. 

This was just a set up for the HOMO REVOLUTION tour, which was the brainchild of my manager, and executed by both of us. Camilo knew that in order for us to really get attention, we would have to take our act on the road. We gathered a variety of LGBT rappers including some from PICK UP THE MIC, and some new ones. Just the name, HOMO REVOLUTION TOUR, got us attention that resulted in appearances on HOWARD STERN, TYRA BANKS, CNN and a lot more mainstream press. I would have to say that GAY RAP was on the HIP HOP radar!

2008 was time to see the fruits of our labor. So many of the rappers from PICK UP THE MIC made great professional gains with tours, videos, and great albums. I think the biggest and best surprises was the impact on the next generation of rappers. So this is where the conflict comes in. A lot of the new gay rappers that started to pop up claimed they had never heard  there were gay rappers already, or just didn't appreciate our styles. Whatever the case, it was already documented in PICK UP THE MIC. Some rappers took another route and reached out to the pioneers to help with their young careers. CAPTAIN MAGIK was a catalyst in the formation of OUTHIPHOP.com which was eventually created by Camilo Arenivar in 2008. 

I too was inspired by the new crop of out rappers, that I started LIL MILO MANAGEMENT in the tradition of my manager -- to advance the next generation of rappers with knowledge I had already attained. DREW MASON, DaLyrical, and CAPTAIN MAGIK are 3 of my out artists that I am proud to be a part of their growth as artists. I also made an impact on renowned author and iconoclast KHALIL AMANI S.A. - who became the spiritual advisor to out hip hop. He has been one of our few straight allies who not only wrote a book about our scene, Hip-Hop Homophobes, but regularly advances our cause  with a vicious tenacity.

This leads me to my only gripe! There are a few of the new rappers that do not know what being an artist is all about. They do not want to be artists, but they want to be stars. Maybe it is because the PICK UP THE MIC artists were before the MYSPACE, FACEBOOK, YOUTUBE and TWITTER days when the struggle was part of the journey. We were picking up the mic because we grew up on and breathed hip hop. The stardom followed, but that was just reward for years of being on the grind!

Don't get me wrong, I see a lot of the new out rappers that understand what being an artist is all about. I also know that the work we PICK UP THE MIC artists have done whether you like it or not, has had a direct impact on the evolution of out hip hop. The overall message is that knowing our past will prepare us for the future.

I have had some personal struggles and animosity toward some of these newer artists that think they are stars overnight. A mention in SPIN magazine was not necessarily of their doing, but I think the fact they got some notice before a lot of struggle has left some with a warped sense of reality. I recommend all out rappers pick up a copy of PICK UP THE MIC when it comes on DVD so you can see the evolution of our revolution. The revolution is far from being over, but just a footnote to the newbies. ALL this didn't happen overnight so stay on the grind and make it easier for those that come after you.

Comments

[Tfixx]

What more needs to be said, foo? You put it out there for many of us that feel the same way. I've grown "tired of talkin'" so I love it when an OG puts it out on the table. Much luv and appreciation.

[Jeff Moraes]

Sou brasileiro meu nome é Jeff Moraes e gostaria de receber o contato da produção do Dead Lee.
meu email: jm. producao@bol.com.br

[Jim Allio]

Well spoken and something that needs to be said, plus an excellent blog entry. Honest, insightful and "straight"forward. Sometimes folks need to be checked before they forget the history. It has really only been a minute (relatively) since you broke down the doors as a hardcore homo thug rap artist, and, you're right, dues were paid. Stay up!

[Milo]

And oh yeah Deadlee, I am proud of all you've achieved and your continued growth. I'm especially impressed at what a great piece of writing this blog was.

[Milo]

Oh my God Larry Bob, that's great! I've actually said that to someone who was soundchecking at MJ's Bar, which has been INCREDIBLY awesome to work with at having homo hop/out hip hop shows there. I've jokingly said, "this is a soundcheck not a rehearsal". Soundchecks should not be the the place to do your show rehearsal!

[Larry-bob]

I was running an event the other day and had soundchecked this kid. Then AFTER that he asked to get a soundcheck. I said "I thought you just had a soundcheck?" He wanted to run through all his verses with the mic. The problem was, the soundsystem was also being fed into another room where people were and would be disruptive. Without thinking, the phrase "Soundcheck is not rehearsal" poped out of my mouth. Anyway, we were done talking, and he was talking to his adult mentor about how he was "an artist."

I don't know, does it seem right that anyone who wants to can claim to be a self-designated "artist"?

[Khalil Amani]

Very insightful! As the saying goes, "No man is an island!" Let us honor those who came before us and paved our paths. Keep up the great work Deadlee, your brother in the struggle.